Sunday, March 11, 2007
I Can't Wait for Summer
I can't wait for summer because then I will be able to open my windows and let in the fresh air. My opened windows will also allow me to to hear the birds singing and the gentle rain falling on warm summer evenings. But the greatest treat in store for me when I open my windows in the summer is that I will at last be able to hear every last shriek and wail of the world's loudest children who live in the house behind mine. From sun-up to sun-down they go into their back yard and holler at the top of their young, healthy lungs. I don't know exactly how many of these adorable children there are, because they are shielded from my sight by their garage. But, judging from the noise they make, I would have to guess that there are at least 450 of them. It's such a comfort to know that their mother is inside the house ignoring their caterwauling and bawling, yelling and and laughing. I suspect she is inside there watching close-captioned soap operas, because she must be deaf.
The Loud Family is not the only high-decibel emanation from the rear of my house. Because now, right next door to them and abutting my property line is a property containing two young, large, obnoxious dogs. They love to bark and bark. I'm sure that their vicious barks and snarls are not indicative of any malice on their part. They are just being doggies. They enjoy exploring the world around them by bouncing soundwaves off of it. They take particular pleasure in bouncing their shrill soundwaves off me, as I get out of my car and go into my house. What a joy to be barked at in my own driveway. Another joy is to have one of the Loud Family children standing on his side of the fence and teasing the dogs into a frenzy. Meanwhile, the dogs' owner is apparently enjoying close-captioned television inside his house. Good for him. What is not to like about a person who buys pets in order to ignore them.